Lonely non-poetry late at night

too tired to think straight,

i'm likely to say something i don't mean

or do i, but i'm no longer inhibited from saying it?

trying to study the brain

and all that's on my mind is you.

listening to A.I.H. and it's all me

all me thinking of you

frustrated with not getting you

my mind looks for escape

frustrated with escapes

it dwells on you contentedly

your memories are the best drug

after your presence in the room

i'd run away from this 

hot box of you

but it's dark outside

and my feet need a break

and my head needs filling

my head needs sleep

if i could, i'd dream of you

dream of your smile

your dancing

your enthusiasm

but my dreams don't listen

to what my frontal cortex says

they do their own thing

making sense of this world

that doesn't have you in it

right now

billions of nerves

and i'd say half

are focused on you

a quarter on the music

and a few on these lame words

and the rest lost in neurotransmitter noise

10 minutes until

self-imposed deadlines

take effect.

if I can fight the

inebriation of studies

i'll pray to dream of you

while memories of brain facts

sink into place